Surprisingly Chipper!

Well it's a Monday, I had to come back to work, I have loads of chores to do at home, I got little sleep last night and I found out this weekend that we're worse off financially than I thought we were...BUT...I'm surprisingly in a pretty darn good mood. I didn't mind coming to work this morning at all. I was actually happy to see my coworkers. What's wrong with me??!?! LOL I think I'm just glad that H is better and we're back to our normal routine. She woke up at 5:30 this morning and screamed at me because she'd thrown both pacifiers on the floor...I walked into her bedroom to see her standing there bouncing up and down pointing frantically to what I assumed to be a pacifier on the floor...it was pitch dark so I couldn't see, but I felt around and yep there it was. And no this does not make me want to break her of her pacifier habit. The reason why is a whole other post, maybe I'll write it at lunch. Anyway I picked her up and took her back to bed with me, where she slept on my chest for about 15 minutes before rolling around my bed kicking me in the boobs. For some reason my back is now KILLING me, even after Ibuprofin and a heating pad all morning?? Weird. Anyway she was in a very good mood this morning, drank 4 oz. of a watered down bottle in my bed which is an improvement on yesterday. Then she let me get her dressed no fuss and sat there watching Sesame Street while I got ready. Actually she fell asleep on the floor, butt up in the air and everything. Tired girl. When we got to Heather's and I woke her up she saw the red swing in the tree in their front yard and she got really excited...she pointed her fat little finger and said "doise!" or something of that sort, you know one of her made up gibberish words she babbles all the time. Then we got inside and she went right to Heather, then no back to me, then no back to Heather...then she cried when I was leaving which isn't normal, so I told her it's ok, and then she was fine. I could tell she was VERY happy to be there, I think I bored her to death last week. We def. need to get her some outside toys, it was pitiful to see her just sitting there on the bare patio all weekend staring at cars going by.

My friend finally emailed me back...she used to work here, now works at another company that I applied for a job at and didn't get...and I never heard from her again since then, and that was a couple months ago! She has a son 3 months older than H and we've been pretty close, but I thought jeez maybe she was really a shitty person and I didn't know it and now she thinks she's too good to be friends w/ me since I didn't get that job? I'm silly, I know. But she finally emailed me back, said she's been super busy. They bought a house and are remodeling it now(I am jealous of everybody, they all suck, why is this not ME buying a house?!?! GRRR) and she said she misses getting together w/ me...and then asks me if I know of any cheap daycare in town because their new house is closer to town...SO, I kind of feel like the only reason she emailed me back was because I know quite a bit about the daycare situation here. Maybe I'm just being silly again...but I seem to always end up with shitty friends for some reason, so I really feel like maybe she's just using me for info now. Hopefully now, we'll see. I don't have many friends left as it is, I'd like to keep the ones I've got, and I really thought she was a good person.

My cousin also finally messaged me back, said he sent me one last week but his dad's computer sucks balls so he's assuming I didn't get it. That's kind of a whole other post too, we've lost touch over the years...we used to be like best friends, we're the same age and grew up together. I got all reminiscent(or whatever that word is) a few weeks ago and emailed him about missing the old days when we entertained ourselves w/ raking gunk out of the pond in his back yard hunting for crawdads and shooting bottle rockets down into the water to see the smoke bubbles pop to the top. Anyway I thought maybe he didn't like me anymore or something since I know he read it but didn't reply(are we seeing a trend here? I think I need to get some self-confidence or something??) but he finally did. So that made me feel better.

Cleaned out the pantry a little bit last night...ok I'll be honest, I cleaned off one shelf...anyway I realized WOW we are running really low on food. All this crap I bought at Walmart like right before Xmas and Thanksgiving already freaking expired!! I figured out you've gotta watch the Walmarts around here...I've bought expired tuna there before too, and frozen dinners...and those things last for years, so how freaking long did they have them in storage!??! So I need to scrounge up the money to restock the pantry...I HATE being poor. It sucks to not even be able to afford meat. This tax money is not lasting NEAR as long as I thought it would.

Unfortunately D didn't get picked for that job this summer with the Conservation Dept. So he's going to have to look elsewhere for his experience. Hopefully he can find something where he gets paid, because we'll need the money bad this summer...but on the other hand he needs to just find any experience he can regardless of pay because you can't get a job after you graduate in this field around here w/out any experience. So we'll see.

Well I guess I better get back to work. More later...

And Wendy thanks for all the comments, I'll check out your blogs at lunch!!