Tuesday, July 31, 2007

FRIDAY’S POST!!---Once in a while you've just gotta relax!!

Yesterday was a GREAT day!! This week may have started off cruddy, but it’s ended wonderfully! Wednesday afternoon my mom came in to work to see my new office. She’s not working right now because school is out. She wanted me to leave work and go goof off with her. I only had 2 hrs. left though, so I didn’t. But yesterday I wasn’t going to have anything to do all day at work…so after I got my checks ran I left and went to her house about 10:30. We ate lunch at a local drive in place we’ve gone to for years. It was nice to not have to worry about Hailey trying to climb out the window or getting chili and cheese all over the radio knobs for once. Then we laid out at my mom’s pool for a couple hours. I haven’t been able to do that in years! Just lay by the pool, mid-day, very hot, enjoying just baking in the sun. It was nice! Then we picked up Hailey about 4:00. I could tell she couldn’t figure out why we weren’t in my car(my mom drove). I kept asking her if she wanted to go swimming. She was confused…we don’t usually swim on weeknights, except in her little baby pool in the front yard every now and then. We went to a place we’ve never been before here in town that I’ve heard the little kids LOVE. We were driving down the long driveway and she looked confused. Where were we going?? It’s way back in a wooded area. Finally we got to a big clearing, and she could see across the parking lot all the fountains and stuff. She started to get really excited and laugh and point. I asked her if she wanted to go swimming and this time she knodded her head very enthusiastically. I got her into her suit and we walked up to the front gate. My mom was lagging behind messing with the car, and Hailey kept turning around and yelling “MON!” which is how she says “C’mon!” She could hardly contain herself as we got closer, she was clapping and shrieking and giggling. It’s a children’s play area—the water is only about 10 inches deep at the deepest part so it’s nice and shallow to walk through. There are concrete slides and fountains. It’s basically a huge glorified kiddy pool! So neat!! It was only 3$ a piece for my mom and I to get in, and Hailey was free! We found a good place to put our blanket out and I greased Hailey up in sunscreen(she helped—she loves putting lotion on) while we waiting for the 10 minute break to be over. Finally the whistles blew and we waded in. She had a BLAST! She wanted to go down the slides right away. She kept saying “Ride! Ride!” First I put her between my legs and we went down, and the water splashed up into her face and over her head at the bottom and she just laughed her deep belly laugh. She loved it! Then I started putting her beside me and going down with her. She had so much fun. She loved wading around in the water and trying to “swim” on her belly. Her butt kept floating to the surface and she’d stick her face down in the water and then pull it out and just laugh and laugh. She shook her hand at the leaves in the water and said “pooey”…then tried to step on them because she though they were bugs. We stayed for about an hour and a half, until she started shivering a bit and her lips started turning purple. It wasn’t cold out, but the wind had picked up just enough to make her cool I guess. Then we went and got pizza for dinner and she ate 2 pieces of pizza and some peas while she watched Shrek 2. She is OBSESSED with Shrek lately! “Shek! Weevee! Shek!!” That’s all I hear. Thank God I like them too. I’ll be glad when the 3rd one finally comes out on video…my luck by then she’ll be over her “Shek” phase by then though. After we ate we left her with daddy while we ran to Walmart to get diapers and stuff like that. Then I took her home and we read about 5 books before bedtime, and she fell asleep while I was reading again tonight! This time to One Fish Two Fish. It was an absolutely wonderful day…very relaxing and very fun!! I’m really excited that today is Friday and we’ve got the whole weekend ahead of us. D wants to take Hailey back to PL(the place we took her last night) since he didn’t get to go, but it’s always really busy on the weekends from what I hear. But we’ll see!!

I actually got some sun yesterday, I’m getting pretty dark! I haven’t been this dark for a few years now! My forehead is peeling a bit which bugs me, but oh well. OH! Another thing I have to mention that I am so friggin excited about. I went through a bunch of clothes that I’d try to sell at a garage sale(everybody that came to the sale last summer were all bigger sizes, I can’t find ANYBODY to buy my little clothes!) and I found a bunch that fit me again! One pair of khaki shorts still had the tags on, and I washed them up and they fit me perfectly! It was like going on a huge shopping spree in my own storage! I found a bunch of tank tops, some that had the tags still on, that fit now. Of course a ton are still way too small, back from my highschool days when I was teeny tiny. But a bunch of them do! And the best part about it…I found my knit skirts from a few summers ago that are so comfy and cute, and I found my whole bag of underwear!! YEA!! I had bagged it all up when I was pregnant, because it didn’t fit anymore and I knew it never would again. But now it does fit again, so I have literally a whole drawer full of underwear now! You do not know how good that feels. I have thongs that are comfy and thongs that are pretty and comfy big ol nighttime underwear and all my VS underwear in all their diff. styles and colors and patterns. I feel like I hit the jackpot! I could wear a diff. pair every day for like 2 months and never have to wash any if I felt like it! I am so freaking excited. My goal for the next 2 or so weeks is to go through all the rest of the clothes I have bagged up and get rid of what I don’t want and organize everything I do want. I need a bigger dresser, mine doesn’t hold squat so I’ve got piles of clothes all over my bedroom floor. I’m thinking I’ll take my closet doors off and hang up a rod w/ a curtain instead because I just can’t get to anything with these big doors—the kind that just slide back and forth.

Yesterday my mom went in the post office to mail a package. I sat in the car, in our prime front-of-the-building parking space. At first it was exciting to just sit and people watch, enjoying the fresh air w/out having a toddler babbling at me in the back seat very impatiently to turn on the radio or yelling at the sun to get out of her eyes etc. It was amazing how many people were in SERIOUS need of some fashion/bodily grooming help. Now don’t get me wrong, in no way am I “trendy” and I do not have perfect hair and my face is a bit broken out etc…but some of these people were just ridiculous. I am not one to judge, but come on…I saw many women with HUGE wedgies. One girl looked like she was about 50 in the face, with the frizziest fried looking hair and she was dressed like she was a teenager…and she was what I call a “walking trend”…every trend that’s hot right now, she had it on her body. Seriously. It was just goofy looking. Another lady looked like she hadn’t washed/brushed her hair in days…she had on faded stretched out knit shorts way over her belly and much too short on her legs, w/ this short misshaped tank top on that showed off her big ol saggy boobs that were in great need of some support. And she had on some sort of hiking shoes. Nice. These people would all be wonderful candidates for What Not to Wear. Eventually I got bored, and I sat there and just stared off into space, looking over hopefully ever time I heard the door opening…finally my mom came back out, and I was happy to be leaving. I thought to myself “Good God, this is how dogs feel that are left in the car”…

Everything is down at work today so who knows when I’ll be able to post this…going to be a long day! We got bagels though from Panera (St. Louis Bread Co.) so that already started the day off good! Plus my mom’s coming in for some training w/ my boss, and we’re eating lunch together!

I almost forgot…Hailey is running now! It’s so cute! Yesterday at the sitter’s she ran across the yard yelling “I run! I run!” She also told the sitter “I wanna cracker.” Instead of making me nervous, her new attitude and new changes are making me excited now! This is the stage I was really excited about, where she could communicate and we could take her to do more things and we could lay on the couch and watch a movie together etc. I’m loving having a little girl!!!

Wednesday, July 25, 2007

Newfound hope

Hailey had a really good night last night. No tantrums. I repainted her toenails—I’m loving this!! She actually sits and lets me paint them while she watches her movie. Which is another nice thing lately…she’s getting into movies, yay!

Aunt Lee and Cousin R came over last night and we went to Home Depot(to return the infamous SpotBot, for 50$ less than I paid for it because I don’t have a receipt, even though it’s defective!!) and Taco Bueno(where Hailey pigged out on cheese sauce even though it’s spicy!) and she was really good. She did fall and get yet ANOTHER bruise…this time on her cheek, from a chair leg. My poor little girl looks like I beat her. Seriously I’m glad her dr. appt was LAST week or they’d probably be calling DFS on me! She’s really starting to talk a lot more recognizable sentences now, which is really cute and exciting!! She also fell asleep while I was reading the book Love You Forever to her tonight(which is really sort of an odd book, but it makes me cry every stinking time!!), which was so nice and peaceful. It was a really good night. Gave me courage and hope, that I can deal with this phase of her life…I just have to be patient, sweet and loving with her…I realized it must be frustrating to her too, to be stuck in the middle like that and not know how to deal with it…to have these new emotions she doesn’t know what to do with, to only half be able to communicate and not be able to tell us exactly what she wants/needs sometimes…to not understand the way the world works just yet, and WHY OH WHY can she not stick her hand in the VCR or run off in the grocery store. We’ll get through it. I’m feeling much better about everything today.

Note: Hailey has gotten a bump/bruise/scrape of some sort every single day since this past Friday. She’s also learning to run.

Also, D and I are doing better. I can tell he’s really putting forth more effort to be lovey towards me, and I’m really putting forth the effort to include him in our family again. I realized that to a certain extent the situation was my fault. I was telling my mom about Hailey’s day instead of my husband. I was frustrated when ANY of his things were left out at home, but yet my crap and Hailey’s crap are piled everywhere. I would feel angry if I woke up in the morning to a few wiskers in the sink or a milk cup beside the couch, even though I’ve told him a million times those things bug the hell out of me. Then last night I was sitting on the toilet watching him shave…and I realized ok he lives here too. How crappy has he felt these past few months, me getting increasingly more strict towards him and griping at him constantly…I know exactly how he had to feel. Because that’s exactly how my mom started treating me before I moved out. All my stuff had to be in my room, nowhere else in the house or it was a “huge mess”…she griped if I forgot and left a cup out overnight…she griped at my schedule etc. etc….just like I’ve been doing to D. I don’t know why…I just know I really started pulling away from him and it got to where he didn’t feel much like part of the family anymore. I think it’s because he’s gone all the time because of school/golf…and I was trying to rely on him after Hailey was born and I realized I couldn’t because he’s not around much…so I went the extreme opposite and made it to where I didn’t need him at all. Which is really sad. So…we’re working on it. I told him I’m going to have the sitter write down Hailey’s day from now on. She usually just writes in on a dry erase board and verbally tells me things…but I’m going to have her write stuff down now, including what she ate, her naps, cute things she did, owies, etc. So he can read it at the end of every day. So I won’t forget to tell him things. He liked that idea. And we’re going to get out more together, as much as we can with his schedule being so packed. Yes he needs to spend time with Hailey, but we also need to spend time together too. And speaking of Hailey, he’s been really making a point to spend time with her each night, as long as he can…even if it’s only 10 minutes before he has to go to work. And we can already tell a difference. I think how she treated him last Friday really made him realize that he needs to work on his relationship with her as well. So hopefully over the next couple months things will get even better, with us all really making an effort.

Today has been a better day at work so far too. Still VERY bored…still nothing to do…but everybody seems to be in better spirits today, and even highandmighty girl has spoken very nicely to me and apologized about something that happened. Let’s hope the day continues this way, and that Hailey has a good day at the sitter’s and we all have a good night tonight!!

This morning in the car Hailey was getting frustrated with the sun. She is not really fond of sun in her eyes, yet she won't wear sunglasses. I don't blame her, I'm the same way. Anyway she's taken to trying to boss the sun around. This morning from the backseat..."No ite! Eyes! No ite!!" Which translates to "No light, you're hurting my eyes!"

Tuesday, July 24, 2007

Hailey

Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket

More negativity...

People are so fake it’s ridiculous. It drives me up the wall when somebody is half-assed nice to my face and then talks about me behind my back…or worse, is bitchy to my face for NO APPARENT REASON—which seems to happen quite often at this place. I hate the fact that this person doesn’t even know me and doesn’t like me. There are no “fairytale” jobs…I was so stupid when I started here, thinking I’d found this dream workplace where everybody got along and things were just great. Everybody does not get along, everybody talks behind each other’s backs, and you have to choose sides. I’m sorry but I’m not one to dislike somebody unless I have a real reason. And because I’ve chosen not to dislike certain people, apparently I’m slowly becoming disliked myself. How silly is that? It’s not all bad. But a couple bad apples can spoil a whole bunch. I don’t want to be here today. Pissy girl started my day off bad when I brought her something she needed and she acted like she was SO ANNOYED with me. I’m bored…I don’t have enough work to do at all so that makes for a very slow day...and plenty of time for me to obsess over everything wrong in my life right now. I go to ask somebody a personal question and people that walk by think OH MY GOSH that I’m talking about them. I’m just tired of it all. But yet I’m scared to go home to my kid at night now because I don’t know if she’ll be Miss Snotty IcandoanythingIwant girl or if she’ll be her normal happy go lucky self. Honestly, I just want to go home and curl up on the couch and go to sleep. I feel like crap, I have a migraine…the whole bit—head pounding, jaw/temples hurting, upset stomach, sensitive eyes—and I don’t want to go home because I know everybody will be talking about me afterwards…how sad is that?? Plus I would have to go get Hailey in a couple hours anyway. Not even worth wasting the time. My sister is supposed to come over tonight, and I feel bad that I feel so horrible because I’m probably not going to be that great of company…plus who knows how Hailey will be towards her. She normally loves her, but w/ her attitude lately she may tell her to piss off…well not quite those words, but you get the picture.

And someone must have just farted in the hallway because it’s drifted in my office and BLEGH if I didn’t already feel sick enough from my migraine now I REALLY feel sick. How gross is that.

I’m sorry to be so negative again, but things just aren’t going right right now.

Monday, July 23, 2007

MWAH

I forgot to mention...starting last week, Hailey started adding sound effects and puckered lips to her kisses. She puckers up her lips, puts them to yours and then says "MWAH!" It is so stinking cute. I got about a million MWAH kisses over the phone while we were gone on our trip. Totally made my day each time. Love her to pieces!

WHAT.A.WEEKEND
(aka...The Longest Post EVER)



Where to begin…

Well first of all, I took Friday off work. To spend with Hailey. You know, because we were going to be gone all weekend and I wanted to see her before we left…GAWD was that a mistake. I don’t know if she could sense we were leaving, or she was just feeling extra cranky or what. But it was a BAD morning. She was fine the first couple hours after she woke up. I was packing, she was packing her pacifiers in my suitecase, and packing her cookies in her own overnight bag. I took her pacifiers out of my bag…is that what started it all? Did she realize she wasn’t going with me at that point?? I have no idea. But all hell started breaking loose. She clung to me like she did when she was little. I couldn’t do anything without her at my legs, pulling my pants down and yelling and screaming at me. I was at my wits end. I fed her lunch. All of a sudden she decided she did not want the rest of her peas. “NO!” I asked her at least 3 times, and each time, “NO!” So I put them on the kitchen counter. Oh God, I took away the kid's food, she was dying of hunger, I tortured her…at least that’s how she acted. She ran over to the counter, threw a huge fit, went to throw herself down on the kitchen floor and throw a fit like she does…and she threw herself into the oven, hitting the corner of the handle on the drawer with her forehead. I freaked out and ran over…big ol goose egg with a cut in the middle, right behind her hair line. I finally got her calmed down by giving her like 10 of these little organic cookies that she likes. Then I tried to rock her and read a book, thinking she was tired. Oh she let me know that was not the case. I lost it, yelled at her that I had no idea what she wanted and she needed to spend some time in her crib while mommy cooled off…and I plopped her in her crib. You’d think I was murdering her. She screamed and cried…of course D, who does hardly any of her care and none of her discipline rushes in the room(and btw was doing nothing to help me pack or get ready to go), yells at me to stop yelling at her, and goes to get her out of the crib. I went over and told him no, leave her there. We cannot let her run this household and get her way all the time. He pushed me away, NOT HARD, but since I’m a huge klutz I tripped backwards over her toys on the floor and fell backwards onto the floor. D tried to catch me but he wasn't quick enough. I felt so stupid. And damn did it hurt my head. And then I felt absolutely horrible because Hailey FLIPPED out and started screaming frantically. D picked her up out of her out of the crib and she struggled and struggled reaching for me, so he laid her on my chest. She clung to me for dear life and just cried. Then I realized…good God, she thinks he pushed me onto the floor. She thinks daddy hurt mommy. She was terrified of him after that. I felt so bad. Here I was fighting with him, well just arguing a bit, in front of Hailey, which I vowed never to do because of all the crap I had to witness from my dad(not my mom, she was wonderful) when I was a kid, but I was at my wits end…and here Hailey and I were bickering…and then this happens, and D starts acting like it’s all my fault that she’s acting terrified of him and here my head is pounding from me hitting it on the floor. Damn talk about a bad morning. D left, said he had to run some errands. He was very hurt, about the whole thing…about Hailey not wanting him, about me being so upset with the whole situation. Here we were supposed to be all lovey dovey, getting ready to go on our anniversary trip, and this happens. I tried my best to get ready, I threw some things in Hailey’s bag and left. I ran by work to use the net for my bank account, since our internet at home isn’t working...Hailey brightened up a bit. I called D and asked if he minded if I just went ahead and dropped her off at my mom’s…it wasn’t like she would have let him tell her bye anyway…he said that’s fine. Honestly by that time I was just ready to hand her over to somebody, I just needed a break. Which I feel horrible saying, because I work 40 hrs a week…I hardly ever get to see her, and I was going to be away from her all weekend, and here I was at my wits end needing a break. It was just a bad morning. She was happy to be at my mom’s. She waved bye to me, barely looking at me…watching her Curious Buddies movie. I went and got D, we got Arby’s for lunch and got on the road. We were both just kind of blah. Trying to make the best out of the rest of the day though. Which leads me to our trip…

So we get down there and the cabin is very neat. I’ll update with pictures later, can’t as my internet at home isn’t working right now. It’s in the back, with a huge deck all to ourselves. We went down to the pool. D starts griping. Doesn’t want to take off his shirt because he thinks he’s fat…he’s bored and hot…the pool is too crowded. D---- Downer. He finally went and got us some drinks from the bar. Then he bitched because he got a beer and he doesn’t like beer, but men are supposed to drink beer not those sissy girly drinks. BLAH He was being so silly! We finally got in the pool and he started having a good time…then I was starving so we had to get out, and he was bummed but ok. We went to eat. He griped that it took too long. He was just in a mood to gripe at everything I guess, which happens sometimes. I think when he’s tired or just isn’t in the right frame of mind. That night the people in the level above us, a bunch of guys(huge busybodies that would not sit down!) annoyed us walking back and forth across the floor and going in and out onto the deck about a million times. Finally I decided to just try to go to bed…D wanted to stay up and watch TV. I got up to turn on the AC and damn if I didn’t see a spider crawling ON the bed, going under it. I am TERRIFIED of spiders ok. I mean like I hyperventilate and everything if I come close to one. I kept my cool, surprisingly (was I just too tired??) and got D…he couldn’t find it to kill it. I even looked and couldn’t find it. He even said he wasn’t sleeping in that bed…so we pulled out the sleeper sofa from the love seat and slept on that. Springs poking me in all the wrong places did not give me a good night’s sleep…not to mention the guys upstairs, who didn’t stop walking around til 1:00 in the morning, woke up at 6:00 am!!! How crazy is that?!?! I woke up and told D “Screw this, I’m sleeping with the spider.” I slept in there til 9, waking up every 30 minutes or so. Talk about a sucky night’s sleep. We went to breakfast, then drove to the outlet mall near there that we went to last year on our honeymoon trip. We had so much fun last year! Well we figured we’d do that in the morning, because it was cloudy and so chilly I had to wear jeans. Not exactly waverunner weather. Well we get to the outlet and right away D starts bitching and griping. He hates shopping, and he was letting me know it. It hurt my feelings. He knew how excited I was about going to the children’s outlet stores. Last year he was great, never griped, had fun…not this year. He ended up turning the car around and saying we were going back to the hotel because we were fighting. I was just hurt, and he was being such a huge turd!! He drove all the way back to the room, and seriously I wanted to come home at that point. I was thinking “screw this, I could be with Hailey right now instead of my crappy husband”…how sad is that??? On our anniversary trip!! We fought pretty bad at that point. I even brought up the fact that we seem to have absolutely nothing in common anymore besides Hailey, and that even when it comes to her he doesn’t really have anything to do with her. I told him maybe we should think about getting a divorce. He got all ticked off and started saying really hurtful things, which made me even more upset. I finally just went outside onto the deck by myself and watched the boats go by and cried. I was so hurt that this was how our anniversary trip was turning out. I was away from Hailey, spent all this money on this vacation for us, and this is how it was turning out. Finally he apologized, said he was just tired, and that we could go…I pulled myself together, put my makeup back on and we left. And he did not have that bad of a time. I only made him go to like 3 stores, and 1 store for him. I didn’t even shop for myself. I didn’t even want to…shopping for Hailey is so much more fun. The sun came out and it got hot, so we rushed back to the resort so I could change into my bathing suit, and we rushed back to our 2:30 reservations for the waverunner. We rode that til 5, and it was a lot of fun. I was starving by the time we were done. We went back to the resort and I got ready. D was even really sweet asking them if they could make our reservations 15 minutes later to give me some extra time to get ready. We went and had an amazing dinner and a lot of fun. Afterwards we took pictures on the deck, being silly and posing etc…I don’t know what happened, but from the waverunners on was so nice…we had so much fun and it would have been so great if we’d had a couple more days there. But right as we started to have fun and enjoy each other, we had to start thinking about coming home. Saturday night we laid around on the couch watching a movie and then slept in the spider bed(he never did make another appearance). The guys weren’t as active upstairs, so we got a better night’s sleep…they still woke up at 6, which means I was up at 6, 7, 8 and finally 9. I got up and started packing while D slept in. We went to breakfast, and decided we’d just head home after going to the gift shop because we couldn’t think of anything else to do besides swim, and we didn’t want to get wet before the drive home…so we got home about 1:00 in the afternoon, and Hailey was napping at my mom’s so we went home and unpacked. I left to go get her, brought her home and D climbed into the back seat so happy to see her. He asked her “Hailey, do you love daddy?” She said “Mommy.” (He told me this later) He didn’t let it get to him. We went to his brother’s, and he carried her in and tried to play with her throughout the evening. We got home that night, and she was tired. He wanted to tell her goodnight…and she wouldn’t let him. I told him to come into the bedroom with us, be a part of the routine…she just screamed at him…he said “apparently I’m not supposed to be a part of the new bedtime routine”…and walked out. I feel so bad for him. I could tell he was crushed. I put Hailey to bed and went out to cuddle with D…he seemed ok. We ate pieces of our wedding cake top that we saved then I went to bed.

So…that was our weekend. Hailey had a great time at my mom’s house. My mom said it went so well that she’ll keep her overnight more often for us now. Which is really good, because I realized something this weekend. D and I have separate lives, which we’ve always had…but we don’t really have a life together anymore. I mean we do somewhat, but not like we should. So we’re going to have to really make it a point to spend time together from now on. Hailey is my life, she’s my everything…but I really have to start trying to give D some of my time/energy/love too. He’s always wanting to let one of our parents watch Hailey so we can go to a movie or something, and I’m always flipping out and saying how much I’d miss her and how I don’t get to see her all day at work why would I want to be away from her even more, and I tell him how could he want to do that when he never gets to see her as it is. He’s trying harder than me at “us”…I just realized that this weekend. To me it seemed like I was, because I was trying to get him to be home more and do more around the house, but then I realized he doesn’t care about all that crap, he just wants to do things with me again as his wife. If that makes any sense. I’ve kind of forgotten about being a wife, I’m all mom now…he loves Hailey, but he hasn’t forgotten that he’s a husband too. We’ve just gotta get all this worked out, and it’s going to take some work and effort. Especially now that school will be starting again in less than a month. But at least he’ll be done in less than a year now. And then we can go from there and kind of officially “start” our life as a family.

I don’t know that I’m making that much sense anymore…I’m bored as hell here at work, nothing to do right now, and I’m wishing I was at home. I’m confused as to how to handle Hailey these days, and that’s making me anxious about picking her up from the sitter’s today…I don’t know how to handle these tantrums she’s been having. My mom admitted to me today at lunch that she did have one meltdown while she was with her this weekend…she saw some sippy cups in a catalog and flipped out, stomping and screaming and crying. My mom went and got her a real one and that upset Hailey even more. Then last night at my brother in law’s house Hailey flipped out I thought because her cousin was playing with a toy she wanted to play with. But when he gave the toy to her she flipped out even more. I tried to pick her up and comfort her and she wanted back down and continued face planting onto the floor and throwing a fit. Is this the “terrible twos”??? How do I handle this sort of this? I’m so afraid of doing something wrong and screwing her up emotionally for life. At 15 months how do you teach them to handle their feelings?? Or even figure out what’s wrong when they’re babbling off long sentences of nonsense with only a few recognizable words thrown in the mix?? I’m at a loss. My mom had no advice, she was just as baffled as I was. And how do you keep your cool when this happens over and over and over again and starts driving you insane(like my Friday morning that I just had…) How do you keep from losing it and yelling back?? I need suggestions. I’m seriously thinking about going to Barnes and Noble and buying a bunch of books on dealing with a toddler’s emotions. Because they are a mystery to me. That is not something I have experience with.

On a better note…I bought the newest (and LAST, boo!) Potter book yesterday!! So freaking excited!! Feel so much better just having it in my possession. Don’t know when I’ll get to start reading it(ok I’ll probably start tonight)…but I need to get to it soon. I’m ultra-paranoid I’m going to hear something in the media about what happens before I get to read it myself!! I’m avoiding all internet media sites or anybody I think might spill the beans. How do you find time to read with a toddler w/out staying up really late???

If you made it this far in this post...you're awesome. I think this is definately the longest post I've ever written.

Thursday, July 19, 2007

Owies

I forgot to mention before something cute that Hailey did last night. We went to my mom's for dinner to get her out of the house, since she'd been cooped up at home all day. She was walking through the living room while I was laying on the couch feeling cruddy, and she stubbed her toe on this little rocking chair that was mine when I was little. I told her to come let mommy kiss it and make it all better. She walked over and I pulled her up onto the couch. She stuck her foot in my face, so I kissed all 5 toes and told her it was all better. She shoved her other foot in my face. I kissed those toes too. She got down off the couch...walked over to the rocking chair...and stepped on the rung(that part that sits on the floor) and fake fussed back over to me. I had to pull her back up on the couch, kiss all her toes that she shoved in my face, put her down...only for her to step on it again and do the same thing. 5 times we did this. It was so stinking cute! And we couldn't help but laugh, because she was being so serious about the whole thing. It's amazing to me that she can have such an imagination and know how to pretend at such a young age.

On the mend...well one of us anyway

Well thanks for letting me vent yesterday...and listening to my rantings in my momentary lapse of insanity...does that even make sense? Anyway... I actually contemplated deleting that post last night...but we don't have internet right now at home so that took care of that. I'm feeling better emotionally today, but physically I'm a mess. After dinner last night I started feeling sick. We'd gone to my mom's because Hailey had been cooped up in the house all day. I had to have my mom take us home. I know it wasn't what I ate...I was already feeling a bit off and had been all day. I put Hailey to bed and went to bed myself. I woke up at 1:00am...I'd had this horrible dream about pooping in my pants. How grody is that?? I didn't need to go, but I did still feel really horrible. I finally got back to sleep at Lord knows what time. My husband was still up which irritated me. He stays up too late. Anyway I woke up this morning and did get sick. Lovely. Hailey had a little fever when I got her up...I didn't take her temp but she felt pretty hot. So I gave her some Motrin, she drank her whole bottle and was in a fine mood. She seemed ok being at the sitters, so hopefully she'll have a good day. And hopefully my stomach will settle down(I know it's just stress)!

Wendy gave me a little chuckle this morning...see her comment on my crazy post below... sorry Wendy, I know not all Wendy's are whiners :o) My mom used that nickname on me as a kid. I sometimes call my husband D---- Downer, a spin off of the good ol' Debbi Downer. It irritates him, which makes me laugh at it even more.

I may stay up and running. As long as ya'll don't mind me bitching once in a while. Or whining...whatever :o)

Wednesday, July 18, 2007

Wendy Whiner

I’m having one of my “I suck” days where I’m very down about everything. I’ve been worried about Hailey all day(she’s finally feeling better btw, even talked to me on the phone and said “mommy!” and gave me a phone kiss—totally brightened my bummer of a day)…but I have these days every now and then where everything just snowballs and I end up feeling very crappy about myself and very down about my life. Hailey can’t tell of course, because I try not to let her see me upset. But I feel it. It makes the day very long. Today I’m feeling like nobody likes me and everybody thinks I’m annoying—minus my boss, who I can commiserate with about the crud in the office. My husband’s being a turd. terd. How in the world do you spell that. I have a headache…probably from stress. Money can kiss my ass…we don’t have any and I’m tired of it. Well that’s not true, we have some. But I’m sick of worrying about it. I wanna be the girl with the most cake. Damnit. I’m tired, so that just makes it worse. Why am I so tired this week? Well I was bad, I got busy a couple weeks ago and forgot to refill my prescription for my heart pills. Then I forgot to pick them up once I did refill them. Then I forgot to remind my husband to get them, when he was supposed to pick them up. Long story short…I’m back on them now, and my body’s having to get used to them all over again. Plus side, my heart has calmed down. Down side, I’m OH.SO.TIRED. Like go to bed at 9 wake up at 6 and still feel like I can’t move, tired. Like falling asleep on the bathroom floor when I should be getting ready for work tired. OH! Like being pregnant tired! Yea that’s what it feels like. Like my body just can’t move. I have no energy to even get up and go to the bathroom or get myself a glass of water. But I push through it, and I’m hoping it’ll go away soon. So back to my misery…I’ve even been thinking about shutting down the blog lately. Nobody really reads it, except for a few…and I really do feel like I bore people to death. I think I’m really the only one that cares about my day to day ramblings. I know nobody’s as interested in my kid as me. Should I just write a journal in a notebook instead? Is it really ok to air my dirty laundry to the world? Can you tell I’m not myself today? Today I have issues. Like I said. I’m having an I Suck day. I’m also really achy today which doesn’t help anything. I got a pissy email from a co-worker too. Nice huh. Glad I have my own office now, so I can sit here and wallow in my own pissedoffedness w/out too awful many interruptions. I went and picked up lunch with my boss today…we didn’t want to eat what everybody else was eating for our special “birthday lunch” day. I told her I knew everybody was talking about us while we were gone. They made jokes when we got back. So ridiculous. Normally it wouldn’t matter to me, because I really don’t give a crap if shiny-happy-girl (read: bitchy-hormonal-highandmighty-girl) likes me or not. Or if they think I’m overdramatizing the fact that I have stomach issues and can’t eat smoky barbecue…but today, on my I Suck day, it did bother me. They don’t know me, they shouldn’t judge me. But whatever. Tired of my ramblings yet? I’m thinking out loud, I’m afraid. See, this is why I’m thinking of shutting down…UGH I hate these days.

Hm, as I’m writing this on Word to transfer over to blogger, I’m thinking of not even posting it. I think I just needed to get my thoughts out. Oh well.

15 weeks

Hailey had her 15 month well-check today. She’s 21 lbs 11 oz. and 30 inches long. She did really good showing Dr. P how she can name her body parts. She pointed to her toes and said “toes” and did the same with her knees, nose and eyes. He was very impressed. He asked if she was stringing 2 or more words together, and I told him yes she will say things like "all done" or "my mommy" or "I see outside" or "a car." He said she’s perfect. She had to get 2 shots(the D-tap and the Prevnar shots), which she was not happy about (I wasn’t happy that she had to get them either)…she cried so hard, and I almost burst into tears. She was ok when we got home, just a little low-energy, and she went to bed at 7:30 which is about an hour or so early for her. This morning I woke her up at 6:40 and after she told me "thank you" for giving her her boppies(pacifiers) she started crying like something was hurting her. I gave her some more Motrin and called my mom. She's done with summer school for the year, so she's got 3 wks off and could come over and watch Hailey. She fell back asleep in my lap until my mom got there at 7:30, and then she cried for me when I was trying to hand her over. It broke my heart. She was crying "mommy, mommy" and grabbing onto me. :o( Having to be a working mom is just not fair. But I told her Shrek was in the DVD player and she said "Shek" and brightened up a little. I asked her if she wanted to watch Shrek or Curious Buddies and she mumbled something that sounded like "Curious" so I put that in and she was feeling ok enough by the time I left to wave bye to me. I called a little while ago and my mom says she seems to be feeling ok. I hope the fever and aches go away sooner than they said they probably would (3 to 7 days). Makes me feel even worse about going on our anniversary trip this weekend.

In other news, since Hailey went to bed so early last night I got to watch Beauty and the Geek which I hate to admit I love. Hopefully I'll remember it's on every week and be able to catch it.

Did I already post that my mom and I went to see the new Harry Potter movie this past Saturday? Well anyway, it was awesome. Very good battle scenes and the fireworks were really neat. Professor Umbridge didn't look like what I'd pictured, but I still thought she was portrayed pretty well! I've heard you can't re-read the book before you go see it, so I didn't, and I really loved it. I think that's the mistake I've always made in the past, since the 2nd movie, I've re-read the book before going to the movie and it just ruins it. You know they're going to change some stuff around and leave some things you think are crucial out, so you really have to just look at the movies separately from the books. Speaking of books...the last book comes out this weekend!!! I don't know how I'm going to not hear who dies before I get to read it...my mom is supposed to get one for me since I'll be out of town, but I don't know how I'm going to avoid the media reports since everybody else will see it before me. And I don't know how I'm going to read it because I can hardly get through a book these days because after I put Hailey to bed I've got chores to do and I'm exhausted. I guess I'll just have to put off all the chores til I finish it!!

Tuesday, July 17, 2007

Clean freak

Hailey has been really funny about wanting things neat and orderly lately. Yesterday right when I walked through the daycare door, she was standing there holding something out in her hand at me saying babblebabblebabble"sticker!" She'd gotten a sticker for helping clean up, and she was oh so proud. And I was proud of her! One of the little 2 year old boys decided to knock all the books off the bookshelf and apparently Hailey gasped and ran over and started picking them all up. Such a good little girl. Also at my grandma's on Sunday, if I dropped a piece of corn on the floor while I was feeding her(they don't have a booster of any kind so she had to sit in a normal chair and let me feed her) she would lean over and look at it and say "uh oh! uh oh! uh oh!" til I let her down to pick it up. She'd hand it to me, then get back up in the chair and eat some more. And this past Friday night we went to a local pizza place for dinner with my mom...they always give Hailey a bowl of shredded cheddar cheese, and half of it always ends up missing her mouth and going on the floor. All was fine and dandy til at the end of the meal she looked down at the floor and flipped out..."uh oh! uh oh! uh oh!!" My mom had to take her away from the table and distract her while I cleaned it up so she wouldn't get down there on the dirty floor and try to pick it up herself. When did she become such a neat freak? She obviously did not get this from me. Or did she? Has she watched me picking up her toys or picking up after her when we go places? I've never made a big deal out of it, never made her help. I know the sitter has them sing the "Clean Up Song" and help, so has she just finally caught on from that? Who knows, but it's interesting. She also helped me pick up the other day after D knocked a bunch of papers off the top of our pile of boxes in our bedroom(have I ever mentioned we need more storage desperately???)...I bent down to pick them up, and she crawled under the computer desk and began helping...never mind the fact that she was picking up books and stuff that I had stacked down there, that didn't fall when he knocked stuff over. She was helping and that was the important thing. And I have to say, I don't remember a more proud moment than when I walked through that door yesterday and saw my baby holding up her prized sticker and being told that she'd gotten it for helping. Made me smile from ear to ear. God I can't imagine what I'm going to be like when she does even bigger things, like sleeps in a big girl bed or heck graduates high school. I'm going to be a mess of tears! Yep being a parent is pretty awesome.

Saturday, July 14, 2007

Do the shakorama go go go

I have seen a Curious Buddies movie ONE too many times today. At home while we're inside all I hear is "teewee! weevee!" Which means "Turn on the freaking TV, I want to watch my MOVIE!!" She'll turn on the TV herself and insist I turn on her movie. On the plus side of this whole situation, she can now count to six. Well ok I have to take the credit for that...she loves to count, so we count together a lot. Ok I was just trying to make myself feel better about all the movie watching she's been doing today. SIGH...

Well more good came out of my whole ins. situation. Not only did I lower my husband's rates by getting my ins. through the same place and telling them he's married, but I found out last night that I also got my in-laws rates lowered as well! My MIL called me last night and said they were very thankful because with yet another policy in the family (this ins. company groups policies by family) it lowered THEIR rates too! Their accounts were credited so much that they don't owe another premium for a while now! She was so excited, and she told me that the refund check I got in the mail for D's ins. premiums they wanted me to keep. She said they've contributed so much to D's golf stuff this summer, that she wants me to keep the money and buy myself or Hailey something with it! How nice is that?? So we'll have some spending money next weekend on our anniversary trip!

My younger sister that still lives with my dad and stepmom called Friday and said I could have her dining set. So YAY I have a dining set now! Yea just a little excited about that.

Thursday, July 12, 2007

Nope

Wendy mentioned Snopes.com in a comment...I thought I'd mention I've checked that for the story I heard about Johnson's and couldn't find anything on there. Thanks for trying to help though Wendy! :o)

Who can you trust?

Has anybody heard this mess about Johnson's Baby Bath containing a cancer-causing chemical, as well as many other baby products and personal care products for adults? Someone posted it on their blog on MySpace, and it all looks very real and official. They did however say that there was a statement posted on Johnson's website but when I went there, I couldn't find anything about it anywhere. Supposedly this chemical is produced as a byproduct when making these products and the companies aren't spending the money to take it out because the recommended limit is something like 10 ppm and most of these products contain less than that. The story also says there aren't any guidelines these companies HAVE to follow, like the guidelines the FDA puts on food. As far as the products go, they're more of just "recommendations"...so a product COULD have more than 10 ppm and not get in trouble for it. The story also goes on to say the problem with this is, if you're using 2 or 3 products that have say 6 or 7 ppm, added together you've got way over the recommended limit. Now of course this all concerned me, because I have always been a Johnson's user...every baby that's been born I bought a bottle of Johnson's Baby Lotion for, and I have used it myself for years because of my dry skin issues. So when I was pregnant with Hailey I warned everybody that if they got me anything other than Johnson's I would take it back to the store. Yea I know, bitchy. But whatever. I loved these products! So when I read this "story," I was pretty upset. I emailed the Johnson's people and of course I got back a load of bull. They skirted my question, addressing the issue without answering any of my questions. So now that makes me even less confident in the brand! And now I'm thinking of doing the unthinkable. Switching to Baby Magic **GASP**

So has anybody else heard anything about this or is it just me?????

Wednesday, July 11, 2007

Cherry pie and little boys

I got up this morning and after I got ready I went into the living room to get things ready for Hailey to get up, and wouldn't you know it D left 1/2 the package of Oreos sitting out on the end table by the couch, along w/ a can of soda. So of course there were little piss ants swarming all over it. I was upset about my Oreos, and upset about the ants. I threw the stuff in the trash so I woke D up to empty the trash so it wouldn't be swarming with them as well. I Cloroxed up the ants. Well then D stayed up because he was going to the Lake w/ his dad today to work on the boat. Hailey's not used to seeing daddy in the mornings unless she goes into our bedroom to say "night night daddy"(because he's always still sleeping)...so this morning she was pretty excited, having fun with him. Well it was past time for me to leave and he brought her to me so I could put her shoes on...well she thought he was playing, so she hopped up and said "no!" and started to run by him so he'd chase her. Ok he's NEVER firm with her, he never gets onto her...and wouldn't you know, when she was trying to play with him is when he chooses to be firm. The complete wrong time...he grabbed her and plopped her down on the floor in front of me and this cherry pie toy that she was holding(that was mine when I was little) flew apart and all 4 pieces flew onto the floor and she just sat there and BAWLED. I felt so bad for her. It broke my heart. I sat down and pulled her into my lap and picked up her pie and put it back together(pan, crust, filling, top crust) and handed it to her, and she shook her little finger at D, still crying and said "No no daddy! Pie!" Oh my gosh it broke my heart. And she did not let go of that pie until we got to the sitter's. I could tell her spirits were broken because she didn't even ask to listen to music in the car(which consists of her pointing and grunting and fussing til I turn it on at which point she dances LOL...when I try to tell her it's called music she stares at me with this blank look on her face like she just does not comprehend that word). I hope she's had a good day today. I can't wait to see her tonight, I want to hug her and give her a ton of kisses. Doesn't that just make you sad??? :o( I can't wait to give her her pie when I pick her up.

Last night I was sitting outside letting Hailey play on her slide when the little neighbor boy came up on his skateboard. He's 5. We'll call him Little I. Little I sat there on his skateboard watching Hailey for a minute, contemplating what she was babbling about and discussing the options with me...the dogs? the birds? nothing? I know, thrilling isn't it? That's my life. So anyway then he makes an icky face and groans "I had to do my chores today"...I asked him what his chores were, and he named off a huge list of things(but I imagine there are a lot of chores to do with 2 adults and 4 kids in the family). I felt bad for him, he is only 5 after all, and told him that's a big bummer. He asked me what chores I had to do. I told him I had to do everything. He said "EVERYTHING?! How come?" And I told him "Well that's what happens when you're a mom, and Hailey's too young to help." He asked "Well but what about your husband?" I told him D doesn't do anything around the house. Little L said "Well that means he's lazy." WELL SAID.

Tuesday, July 10, 2007

Random Tidbits

I hate piss ants. Well really I hate bugs in general. And I guess of all the bugs that could invade your home, piss ants aren’t HORRIBLE unless they come in mass quantities or are in the kitchen. My piss ant problem doesn’t include either of those options. But nonetheless, they are annoying the hell out of me. In my experience that Taro stuff, or whatever it’s called, doesn’t work. I’ve tried the spray, and it cuts down the huge groups. But I still keep finding a stray one here and there on or around the couch or the end tables. It drives me nuts. Bugs are so gross! That is one thing I like about winter, no freaking bugs! (Although I do like roly polys, june bugs and fireflys…all typical summer bugs, all cute in their own way and completely harmless!)

I almost got in a wreck last Thursday. A bad one. Like really bad. On the interstate, after work on my way to pick up Hailey. I was behind a lady I work with, in the left lane(passing lane) and we were only going about 60 mph which is the speed limit. We had just passed a truck pulling a trailer with like half a tree on it—very dangerous, sticking up everywhere, didn’t look very secure—when all of a sudden, traffic stops dead. J, the lady I work with, couldn’t see it…the SUV in front of her started swerving into the other lane w/ it’s breaks slammed…J slammed on her breaks, and that’s when I saw the commotion and slammed on my breaks, but it was too late. I was going to rear end her going 60 mph. Luckily that tree truck was going so slow there was no one in the lane next to me—I didn’t check before I swerved, I didn’t even think about it, it’s just pure luck this was the situation. I swerved into the right lane, let off my breaks a second because I was fishtailing, almost hit the concrete edge of a bridge, slammed on my breaks again, began fishtailing another direction, saw an exit as my escape route, swerved up the exit around the cars stopped on the exit and FINALLY I was safe. None of this was my fault, and it’s a good thing I’m a damn good driver w/ a little bit of luck or I would have been seriously hurt. I’ve never been in a close call like that going that fast. Only had to slam on my breaks like one other time before that. So I was pretty scared. I called my mom when I got to the city streets and told her what happened and swore up and down I’d never drive on that highway again. I took the back roads to pick up Hailey, which was a good thing because there was a bad wreck farther up the highway, and that’s why it was at a standstill and backed up for miles. J, my coworker in front of me, got off at the next exit and it took her 15 minutes to get there…and they were very close, we’re talking exits less than ½ a block apart. Anyway the next morning I get to work and right away J comes up and says “How freaking scary was that???!?!” She said she was wishing she’d had my cell # so she could call and make sure I was okay because the look on my face she thought I was going to piss my pants or something, and then the next second she looked I’d disappeared (I’d gone up the exit)…the crazy thing is, my boss, H, almost wrecked as well about 30 minutes after we did. I freaking hate traffic, and I freaking hate our dinky 2 lane Interstate that has enough traffic for 4 lanes! Too bad I have to drive on it twice a day to get to and from work! I did get up the nerve to drive to my cousin’s house which is about an hour and a half away on the outskirts of one of the big cities, to go to her daughter’s bday party. I’m proud of myself…not only is that the farthest I’ve ever driven from home(I’m telling you I hate driving!) but I took Hailey as well and she did great! It was nice to take a little trip just the two of us. She slept on the way down there(til we were almost there, and then woke up exclaiming “Outside! Cars! Birds!” just happy to have a change in scenery I think. And then she listened to music most of the way back late at night.

I had a mini fiasco with my auto insurance. Nothing like poor Kristin is going through, but it did freak me out a bit. I had my auto and homeowners ins. through the company I worked at. Well I quit working there as everyone knows, so I could no longer have an employee policy. I had to have it re-written through an agency. Friday I couldn’t do any work, so I called the main agency they use and emailed them my dec pages. They called me back and told me with D’s 3 traffic violations it made the auto double! I almost had a heart attack. Double?!?! We can’t afford that! We were already paying over $300 every 6 months for the auto, and the HO went from $150 a year to $160 a year too! I got this sinking feeling in my stomach and thought well there goes my raise. So much for maybe making enough to make ends meet every month now. They quoted me at 4 other companies as well at this agency, and they were all higher than my old ins. company’s price. So I got on the phone and called my mother in law. I got the name of their ins. agent through this big name ins. company here in town. I gave him a call. And let’s just say he’s now on my list of top ten favorite people of the year! My husband has his ins. through this company as well as his parents. I had ins. guy(CM) change my husband’s status to married, which saved on his premium(ok his parents are still paying his ins. because he’s still in school, I admit, but that will save them money so I think they owe me a thank you). Then I emailed him my dec pages and had him quote me. He emailed me back my quote. I thought ok surely I’m reading this wrong. He called me and asked how things looked. By going with this company, not only am I not paying double, I’m paying LESS than I was at my old employer!! 100$ less every 6 months on my auto, and 75$ less on my homeowners per year!! How awesome is that? Because D was already written there, his traffic violations don’t matter. So not only do I get to keep my raise, but it’s like I got another mini raise because my ins. went down! I went ahead and paid it all up front so I don’t have to worry about it for the next 6 months.

I guess this was just a post of some other things that have been going on in MY life…for once not all about Hailey :o)

Quote

Pain throws your heart to the ground. Love turns the whole thing around. Know it won't all go the way it should. But I know the heart of life is good.

Monday, July 9, 2007

We don't need no Baby Einstein...

I'm a little perturbed. I have a friend who RAVES about Baby Einstein movies like there's no tomorrow. Her son, who is a week older than Hailey, LOVES them,and has since he was little bitty. I tried them on Hailey a few times at different points in her life, and I tried multiple Baby Einstein movies, and she HATES them. They just aren't for her. Honestly, they drove me nuts too. When she was younger we thought she just hated all TV. Then one night we went to rent movies and the store was having a VHS blowout. I got a children's video for her for 1$!! I had never heard of it before but it looked cute and entertaining. It was called Nick Jr. Baby Curious Buddies, Look and Listen at the Park. And lo and behold, my kid LOVES it! For a LONG time, this is the only thing she would watch on TV. Needless to say, the VHS started to wear out and skip. She was very upset, she LOVES the puppets(she knows them by name--cat, dog, pig, bear and elephant--and she makes each animal sound as they each come on the screen during the intro). So a few weeks ago I got on Amazon.com and ordered 4 new videos for her, DVDs this time, because I got buy 3 get 1 free and free shipping...at 9.95 a piece, this was a great deal!! This time we got one about the Beach(which is scratched, so I have to send it back--how annoying), Look and Listen at the Park(again), Let's Move(her fav so far!), and Helping at Home. Now half the time she's awake she's demanding to me "T Wee! T Wee!" and she'll turn it on and whine til I put on her DVD. Her new one, Let's Move, has Bear counting to ten. She LOVES this part. "Nine" is her favorite number. Recently when I would count to ten(which helps her calm down if she's upset!) when I got to 7 or 8 she'd yell "nine!" But Saturday morning she SHOCKED me. I started off counting..."one" and Hailey said "two"...so I repeated her and said "two" and she said "three"(sounding more like "tee") and I said "three" and she said "four"...!!!...so I said "four" and she said "NINE!!!!!!!!!!" Well she got the first part right!! My friend had the nerve to tell me she doesn't want her son just learning songs, she wants him actually watching something educational. HELLO. My daughter is 15 months old and she can count to 4. And she knows what animals are, and all her fruits, and how to clap for somebody when they do something good, and she's learning to stand on one foot and say please...among MANY other things. I'm just annoyed that some parents can't be open minded and realize that not all children learn from the same things, or are entertained by the same things. Just because my child doesn't take an interest in Baby Einstein(which EVERYONE recommends) does not mean she's going to be dumb or isn't going to learn things from other videos. And what's even better, we get a kick out of these Curious Buddies videos too! The songs are catchy and the movies are just entertaining in general! I don't care if other kids don't like what we like. Why do some people have to be so high and mighty? Drives me insane.

Thursday, July 5, 2007

A day to remember

Yesterday was a big day for Hailey. It was the first time she got to experience the 4th of July perfectly healthy. This time last year we were headed to the hospital, they were waiting for her…she was admitted and had to stay for 2 days. She got out the 7th. She was really sick. They had to do a spinal tap, draw tons of blood, take urine, give her an IV…it was horrible! I didn’t sleep much at all those 2 nights. I either sat up rocking her or slept in the big hospital bed they had in her room, her tucked into the crook of my arm. But this year, no sign of illness, she had a GREAT day! She started off sitting on her couch watching some Animal Planet, eating her bowl of blueberries and strawberries I’d given her for breakfast. I was loading the dishwasher. All of a sudden I hear “Mommy!” and I said “What?” No answer. Again, “Mommy!” and again she didn’t answer me. Again, “MOM-MEE!” this time very insistent…so I looked up, and she was standing there in the front hallway grabbing the crotch of her diaper. I said “What Sweetie?” and she said “pee pee.” I asked her “Did you pee pee?” and she said “pee pee.” I washed my hands and went to check, and sure enough she’d just peed…warm full diaper. So I picked her up and told her “Hailey mommy’s going to show you what to do when you need to go peepee” and I took her in the bathroom. I took off her diaper, sat her on her little potty…and instead of hopping up and telling the imaginary pee pee “bye bye pee pee!” she sat there. And lo and behold, she peed a little and she pooped!!! My baby pooped in the potty!!! I was so proud and excited I had tears in my eyes. We woke up daddy and showed him. I tried to take a picture of her next to her poo-filled potty but when I sat her next to it she said “pooey!” and shook her hand like she does and got up and ran off because well it smelled like poop! I am just so incredibly proud of my little girl. Not quite 15 months old, and she understands when she pees and tells me when she goes, and now she even pooped in her potty. How cool is that???

Next, she learned a new word. I was in the tub shaving my legs and she used her potty as a stepping stool and climbed in with me, dress and diaper and all. Of course, being the curious little girl that she is, she started poking at my boobs. I told her “Hailey those are boobs.” And she said “boob” and poked me again. For the next couple minutes, that’s how it went. So, she now knows “boob”….

Another thing she learned, that I really wish she hadn’t…my dad (he’s so awnry) has been trying to teach her the sign for “poop” and to say it while she’s doing the sign. Yesterday she finally caught on, and now she will do the sign for poop and say “poop!” LOVELY. Although I guess there are worse things in life…

Lastly, to end her wonderful day, we went to the old stadium like we do every year to watch the huge fireworks show the city puts on. They spend tens of thousands of dollars on this show, it’s pretty big. Huge loud fireworks, right over your head. She had a blast running around the parking lot with various members of our bunch. As the time grew nearer, they turned off the lights. Hailey said “bye bye lights!” and waved. I started to try and explain to her there were going to be big booms and pretty lights. Yea right like a 1 year old is going to understand that. I was standing there holding her as the first 3 went off all at once. Normally they just do the loud bangs to warn people they’re starting…not this year, they jumped right into the show. She jumped and clung to me really tightly with her face buried in my neck. I told her “Hailey look, oooh, pretty, wow!!” and she looked, and she LOVED them! She sat on my lap and watched them, saying “Ooh! Wow!” and pointing and smiling and giggling! She would NOT let me cover her ears, and they are so loud! It was so cute, on the really bright ones she would squint and sometimes cover her eyes, and then uncover them quickly to see the next one. I am so excited and happy that she liked them. She’s not a scaredy cat like I was when I was her age. I’m so glad we got to share that with her this year. Afterwards there’s always a traffic jam in the parking lot, and she did great playing with D’s phone, talking to some imaginary person and then handing the phone to me for me to talk. She went right to sleep when we got home. She had such a good day!!!

Sunday, July 1, 2007

I'm loving this thing called Communication

Hailey's communicating with mommy and daddy, daddy and mommy are communicating...all is right with the world. It's been a great weekend, finally. D has been helping a ton with the chores, we had a lot of fun together...all in all we've just had a really good time together! Today was very laid back. D got up with Hailey while I slept in. I made myself get out of bed at 11:30...I never sleep that late! A friend stopped by with her kids for about an hour, then I cleaned up after they left, sanitizing toys etc. Hailey went down for a nap so D and I took a nap as well. I slept a bunch today! I got Hailey up about 5:30 and got her dressed. We took her to my mom's and we went grocery shopping. She had a blast playing with my mom, who she hasn't seen in quite a few days.

I have to mention a couple things Hailey did today...you know, things that really stuck out to me. She amazes me every day. First of all while my friend was here with her kids Hailey did really well. My friend's youngest is a 6 month old little girl. I told Hailey to go to her bedroom and bring little C a baby toy to play with. Off she went to her bedroom, and she brought little C a toy! I can tell she pretty much understands what we're saying these days...she does what we say or ask her to do. She knows dirty diapers go in the trash and frequently picks up after mommy when I leave one laying on the floor. She tries to take her dirty dishes and bottles and put them in the sink, although she's too short. Another thing she has learned to do...let us know when she goes to the bathroom! This all fits into the whole communication thing...I'm telling you it's wonderful. Today as I was getting her stuff ready to go to my mom's, she walked up to me in the living room and said "peepee." I asked her "Hailey did you go peepee?" and she grabbed the crotch of her diaper and said "peepee" again. I checked and sure enough, a warm full diaper. I was a bit shocked...she's very interested in the whole process of going to the bathroom, and I know she knows when we go in the bathroom what we're doing because she'll yell "peepee!" and run in after us and want to flush the toilet. But she actually does realize when she has peed now, and today she told me! How cool is that? Hopefully this means she'll be easy to potty train.

Off to bed...I start my new job tomorrow and I'm nervous. Oh and we waited too late to get the pictures developed tonight, so D will have to do it tomorrow...hopefully I'll post the pics then.