Attached at the hip

Hailey was attached to my hip this weekend even more so than usual. She wouldn't play, she wanted to waller all over me, and anywhere we went I had to carry her. She doesn't want anybody else but me. My mom took us to Olive Garden today for soup, salad and breadsticks and Hailey insisted on sitting on my lap the whole time. That's not like her! I don't know what's up, I don't know if she's just loving me more and more every day or what...she just hugs on me all day. Don't get me wrong, I'm not complaining! I love her to pieces. She's my little buddy. But I do feel bad for D. She hasn't wanted much to do with him lately. I guess she's probably just going through another phase. I had to have him take over rocking her to sleep tonight though. She wanted me to keep rocking her, and after 30 minutes or so I tried to lay her down. Usually, no problem, she rolls over and goes to sleep. On nights like tonight, she will never lay down and go to sleep for me. I lay her down and she stands up and cries for me to hold her. So on nights like this, the best thing to do is to hand her off to D. She cries for me for about 30 seconds, then she settles into her daddy and he gets her to sleep no problem. Which is good because I am SO STINKING TIRED. I had to get up with her both days this weekend since D had golf at the butt crack of dawn(he was so not happy about that). Yesterday I took my shower and all that while she was sleeping(the red mark on my forehead is still there by the way) so today I thought YES, I'll finally get a nap while she's napping! She went down about 10:15 or so...I got to sleep about 10:30...and darned if she didn't wake up at 10:45. She was exhausted, but for some reason she woke up crying really bad and wouldn't go back to sleep. So she wallered all over me on the couch for a while til she got hungry for lunch. My mom was going to watch her for a while so I could take a nap, but stupid me I thought no it's too late now I might as well just go about my day. So we went to the mall and I took a shirt back to Penneys that was too big. Before we left the house I had a mini-meltdown. I remember now why I wore the clothes I did before I got pregnant. Why I did wear more "mature" clothing...I can't find anything anywhere here in my size!! It is so frustrating, it brings me to tears. I found so many cute things this weekend that DON'T COME IN MY SIZE. I ended up wearing my white cargo pants and an XS green guy's T-shirt. Talk about frumpy. And then I promptly sat on some chocolate at Olive Garden so it looked like I doodied in my pants. I had to go by my mom's house and change into her black stretch pants...which are a medium so they bagged off my butt, so like always I looked like I dumped in my pants. But damn was I comfortable. And I found the cutest tshirt in the juniors section that has pink flowers all over it...it's pleated up at the top, and I tried it on and what does my mom say? "That looks like a maternity top"...I bought it anyway...hell at least it'll camoflauge my big belly. I've been so bloated lately, I seriously look about 18 wks pregnant. Do I care? Nope. It's funny, I've had 2 people at my new job ask me if I'm pregnant. I thought it was hilarious.

Back to my meltdown. I don't know what the hell to do about clothes. I have none. Nothing that fits or looks decent anyway. I did get a couple shirts this weekend, but that's not a whole wardrobe. Where the hell am I supposed to get clothes?? Everything I can find in the misses sections only goes down to a Small or a 4. If I had money right now I'd go to the Gap. But I don't even know if they'd have anything I like right now. Last summer I got a couple pairs of capris there that I LOVED, I wore them all the time...and now they're way too big for me. It's so depressing! I pulled out this Tshirt from the Gap that I wore last summer that I absolutely LOVED, and OH MY GOD it was huge. How could I have shrank that much? I don't feel that much smaller than I was then...it's really depressing me that I have no clothes, and I just don't know what to do...

I am noting, in case I didn't before, that Hailey loves blowing bubbles and brings them to me all the time asking "bubble?"... and tonight, I left the top unscrewed on her Gazillions of Bubbles, so she dumped it on the living room floor. And those are the expensive bubbles darn it. And how in the world do you clean bubbles off carpet? It just keeps foaming and foaming and foaming.

Today in Penney's Hailey insisted on walking everywhere, and stepping on any spot on the floor while saying "bug!" She STILL loves bugs, and she loves stepping on anything remotely bug-looking. That's my girl.

This post is pretty random and unorganized. I'm so tired. D is done rocking Hailey now, apparently she went to sleep wonderfully for him, thank God. So now that I can make noise in the household again, I'm going to get ready for bed. Yes there is still shredded cheese on the floor from her dinner, and bottles that need to be rinsed waiting in the sink, and clothes to be put away. I don't give a crap. I'm going to bed. Hopefully I won't be so tired tomorrow. I've got a busy day ahead of me.

By the way, we watched Ice Age 2, The Meltdown last night...pretty funny and cute! Better than the first one I think...